Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Cool Light Up Guitar, Semper Fi, & Blank Checks

I know this is suppose to be a funny blog but I didn't find anything really laughable on Facebook today but I did find some great stuff and here it is. 

Today's Top News

Well it seems most of my friends are yapping about the light up guitar that they guy from Rascal Flatts was playing at the CMA Awards Show. I have to admit it is pretty darn cool!

Today's Birthday

Happy Birthday to The United States Marine Corps! SEMPER FI

Latin for "always faithful," Semper Fidelis became the Marine Corps motto in 1883. It guides Marines to remain faithful to the mission at hand, to each other, to the Corps and to country, no matter what.

Today's Great Message

A Veteran is someone, who at one point in their life, wrote a blank check payable to the United States of America for an amount up to, and including, their life.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Coffee Party, Tea Party or Hard Liquor Party

Today's Top News

President Obama is going to be on Mythbusters.  And from what I can tell boys and girls this will have nothing to do with his where he was born! :oP 

Today's Cartoon

I found this cartoon today. Did you know that there is a Coffee Party?  This is apparently the liberal version of the Tea Party. I got curious so I looked them up and found their mission statement.

The Coffee Party Movement gives voice to Americans who want to see cooperation in government. We recognize that the federal government is not the enemy of the people, but the expression of our collective will, and that we must participate in the democratic process in order to address the challenges that we face as Americans. As voters and grassroots volunteers, we will support leaders who work toward positive solutions, and hold accountable those who obstruct them. 
I don't know about you but that says a whole bunch of nothing to me.  Looks like it was written by a politician.  I guess they didn't want to say that they are for bigger government spending? or higher taxes? I mean if they did come right out and say that who would want to be a part of that?

Maybe I could start a Hard Liquor Party?  Where we go to bars and find candidates to run for office.  It couldn't make it too much worse than it is now and they'd be so liquored up they might just tell the truth.  Can't you just see it?  Some guy or gal stumbling up to the podium, slurring out their plan for America? Being real with the folks and just flat out say we're pretty much screwed.  And you know how some women that drink just can't keep their tops on? She's telling her plan for lowering taxes, especially those sin taxes on alcohol, and then she whips her top off.  Tell me that wouldn't make for a more interesting political arena?

Today's Confession

I have a confession to make.  I know I'm always dogging the Farmville and Farm Town addicts but I have to admit that I play way too much Bejeweled Blitz.  It's so addicting and it sucks up a good part of my day one minute at a time.  I go there promising myself only to play five minutes which equals about five games which turns into about an hour.  I find that I'm not alone though as there are fanpages and groups on Facebook  here is just one of many.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Obama Goes Rogue

Today's Top News

I learned that Obama went all rogue and spoke words that weren't spoon fed to him by the telepromter, he said "They talk about me like a dog."  He was referring to the special interests in D.C not being happy with him. (As if they are the only ones, LOL, I wonder if he's seen his poll numbers lately?) I can't even type this without rolling my eyes.  I guess he doesn't consider the unions a special interest?

Today's Great Status

Monday!! You do not fool me by dressing up as a Tuesday..I recognize the beginning of a work week no matter WHAT you call yourself!!

Today's Drama

I got a messege in my little facebook inbox today talking about, Some People!  The sender of the messege, Said Person, didn't mention Some People by name and it was all like "I'm just letting you know that we have a mutual friend and some stuff is going down". I guess if Said Person wrote me before Some People, Said Person would have a chance of me taking their side even though I don't know what the hell was even going on.  I guess Said Person doesn't realize that it's been 21 years since I graduated high school!

Monday, August 30, 2010

There's Nerdy and Then There's Genius

Today's Top News

If you hadn't heard, Rev. Al Sharpton had a rally this weekend in D.C. as a counter to another rally Glenn Beck had.  From what I understand, one had lots of black folks and one had lots of white folks.  This is surprising since Obama was supposed to bring our nation together more.  But it doesn't matter what color Obama's skin is because someone dressed him up like a white boy and put a bicycle helmet on him.  Seriously?  Where in the hell was Michelle?  I want to know what kind of wife lets her husband leave the house dressed like a dork. Obama made me think of something we used to say in the 80's, "You're ugly and your mama dresses you funny!"

Today's Great Quote

"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character." -Albert Einstein

Today's Great Quiz

Today I took the 'How nerdy is your name?' quiz and my result was 66% nerdy.  I guess that's not too bad since my mom got my name from a fictional senator's wife on some soap opera.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Reading, Writing, & Wiping

Today's Top News

Apparently things are getting so crappy that in some places in our great country the kids have to add toilet paper to their school supply list.

I don't know if this is news, it depends on what your definition of news is.

Google is known for having a sense of humor.  I found this story about searching Google for Obama here.

Don't worry if you are a hardcore Obama lover and this upsets you, you can always substitute Obama for Palin and get similar results.

Today's Great Status

Dear Lord, please put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth!

Today's Picture

Well, someone has some strong feelings! I guess this proves not everyone in Texas loves The Cowboys.

Is The News Bugging You?

Today's Top News

I had to do some serious searching to find a piece of news on Facebook that didn't have to do with the mosque.  And then I found this little gem...

"TVNewser has learned the human resources department of TBS Inc. has sent out an email this afternoon alerting staffers of a bed bug problem in their New York City offices at Time Warner Center -- home to CNN, and other Time Warner entities". via Media Bistro

Talk about your work bugging you, aye?  Seriously though why CNN, I mean if anyone was bothered at work and was going to get bed bugs you'd think it would have happened in the "that room" above Dave Letterman's set.  I'm just saying...

Today's Quiz

I believe this is the first time I ever posted a quiz although I see them all the time.  Quizzes about everything from what kind of candy are you, what old movie star you are, to how sexy are you.

Today I took the sillybands quiz. I have to say they are the coolest little things and a definite "OMG, I wish I had thought of that!"  At any rate I got the result that I'm the rockin' roll ones. :)

Today's  Great Poem

He didn't like the casserole.
And he didn't like my cake,
He said my biscuits were too hard.
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't perk the coffee right.
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and
smacked the shit out of him...

Like his mother used to do.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

We're Going to The Chapel

Today's Top News

OMG!!! Be sure to call all your friends and tell them a judge out in California turned over the gay marriage ban.  All I can say is that now the hillbillies are you going to see that and wonder why they can't marry their sister or first cousin. It's all about love right? I guess you could just explain to them that she'd have to be eighteen first.  Ok, I know that was bad!

I do wish I understood how this all worked though since the people of California voted on this and it came out a no.  I imagine though that one could say that if we are all created equal under our Constitution than it wouldn't be fair for one group to enjoy the benefit of being legally married (snickering as I type enjoy and marriage in the same sentence) while another group could not. 

Today's Poem

I do not like this Uncle Sam,
I do not like his health care scam.
I do not like these dirty crooks,
or how they lie and cook the books.
I do not like when Congress steals,
I do not like their secret deals.
I do not like this speaker Nan ,
I do not like this 'YES, WE CAN'.
I do not like this spending spree---
I'm smart, I know that nothing's free.
I do not like your smug replies,
when I complain about your lies.
I do not like this kind of hope.
I do not like it.
Nope, nope, nope!

Today's Chain Status

LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL. (I grew up saying this every morning in
school-it's a shame people take offense.) SEE HOW MANY AMERICANS

Monday, August 2, 2010

Lady GAGa, Sir Churchill, & Jet Setting

Today's Top News

I learned today that Lady Gaga is against Arizona's new immigration law.  I wonder now if one can just go into one of her concerts?  If she doesn't think you need a passport, why should you need a ticket?

On another note...  I know going to the dentist can be really expensive but would you pay 24k for a used set of teeth?  Well someone did, granted they were Churchill's but really EWWWWW!

Today's Great Quote

"Life's's even tougher if you're stupid." - John Wayne

Today's Awesome Video

Saturday, July 10, 2010

The Week in Review - Don't Spread on Me

Did you miss me this week?  Since I didn't post all week I thought I would do a quick week in review.  I know my readers want like to be informed and cultured. *snicker*

This Weeks News

If any of your friends have a cracker of some type as their profile picture and you don't know why...

It comes from a story about that whole New Black Panther thing that happened during the 2008 campaign where some guy was in front of a polling place with a club.  Well the case was dropped, then some guy came out from the DOJ saying he was resigning because of Panther case was dropped cause of a racial thing.  Then out comes this old video of the club holdin' guy talkin' about how he hates every iota of a cracker and that if they want freedom they have to kill some white babies.

While that could be disturbing many people think being called a cracker is funny.

They've even been posting cracker jokes:

How do you change a tire on a cracker's car?
Use a cracker jack.

How do you let go of a cracker at work?
Fire cracker.

Where does a cracker live?
A townhouse.

Cracker out!

Friday, July 2, 2010

4th of July Edition

Today's Top News

I decided not to post a top news story today it's just all too flippin' depressing! And this weekend is about celebration...  so in honor of the 4th of July, I found the School House Rock - Preamble.  :)  It's a classic!

Today's Chain Status

UNITED STATES OF AMERICA....Please remember only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you....JESUS CHRIST and the AMERICAN SOLDIER. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom. If you agree....copy and paste in your status....GOD BLESS THE USA

Today's Fan Page

Who doesn't love some Little Debbie?  I've been a fan of their page for quite sometime and they posted this awesomely redneck desert for you to fancy up any cookout you might be having this holiday weekend.

Have a safe and Happy Fourth of July! 

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Anything is Possible!

Today's Top News

Leaping leprechauns! I learned today the police in Boulder, CO had been called out after several people witnessed a leprechaun leaping between cars and acting as if he was shooting people with his fingers. The police failed to find the fairy tale creature and reported that this is the first time they have ever had a call about a leprechaun.

Isn't Boulder one of those places where pot is legal???

Today's Great Joke

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students.

“Human beings are the only animals that stutter,” she says.

A little girl raises her hand. “I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.”

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.

'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!'

'That must've been scary,' said the teacher.

'It sure was,' said the little girl.

'My kitty raised her back, went "Ffffff!, Ffffff!, FfffffF," but before she could say 'Fuck Off!,' the Rottweiler ate her!

The teacher had to leave the room.

Today's Video

I too like to stand on the bathroom counter and give myself a pep talk...

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

It's all about fancy stuff today!

Today's Top News

You know there are woman that get cheated on everyday, some that live in trailers with some good for nothing loser that can't keep a job... they find out and kick the bum out and what do they get... to keep the rented trailer and the set of Arby's Christmas glasses, that's a combo that could make any woman bitter. But today I found out one woman could possibly find forgiveness a bit easier, Tiger's soon to be ex-wife is going to get a couple of houses and 750 million dollars!  I'd always heard of marrying well but wow-wee that lady divorced well.  If I were her I could so smile at his dumb arse every time I had to see him.  C'mon 750 million that's a whole lot of medicine for the ol' heartache.

*Yes guys I know women cheat too... I'm sure one day we'll get to that.

Today's Remember When

Someone asked on their status today, "What fashion trend did you follow which was very cool then but now looks ridiculous?"

Here are some of the great answers:

leg warmers
half shirts
parachute pants
muscle shirts
big hair
layered socks
bandannas tied around your leg

Today's Fan Page

Someone Will Buy It is all about goofy products that make it to market.  Here's her blog and here's her fanpage!


Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Hot Crazed Sex Poodles

Today's Top News

Is it hot in here or is that just global warming? Silly me I thought the Gores broke up because the site of Al's naked arse grossed out Tipper but I was so wrongAfter reading all of this business I'm just sickened. Of course mainly because some "crazed sex poodle" thought he could just have his way with someone just because he thinks he's special.

And then there's the comment in the article about a liberal friend who told the woman, that Gore tried to bore, (you can take that one either way you'd like) that she couldn't tell on him because then the planet would suffer if Al didn't save it from global warming.  REALLY?  People like that vote folks!

Today's Best Status

You know it is a bad Tuesday when you think you Monday might have been better...

Today's Fanpage

It's ours!  There are now 51 members and I know there are more people like myself out there.  You don't have to take a test to vote, to reproduce, or join our page!  Now that's justice.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Animals, All of Them!

Today's Top News

I found out today that Hayward from BP went to some yaught race thing and Obama went to play golf.  If you ask me they both should be shampooing a pelican or something.  That other dude might have said "small people" with words but Hayward and Obama scream it with their actions.

Today's Fun Photo

My son would be mad at me for posting this... he'd think it was insulting the hyena.

Today's Great Status

watching and laughing at the kids trying to catch the pigs...

Now that's country! Poor Wilber.

What did you learn on Facebook?

* I'll be on vacation for a week so, I don't know if I'll be around here or not but I'll see you next week for sure!

Friday, June 18, 2010

Scary Stupid, Scary, & Just Stupid

Today's Top News

There's nothing funny about today's news. I got a serious WTH!?  moment after reading this:

A New England school district has approved a measure that will provide free condoms to elementary school students and direct teachers not to comply with parental wishes to the contrary.

Seriously?  I'm not old fashion by any means but since when did this become ok?  Do schools feel like they can do whatever they want because parents have become dependent on them?  I know I have issues with the schools my children go to but they don't even come close to the above.

The article went on to say:

School superintendent Beth Singer supported the instruction aspect of the rule – explaining that younger boys and girls might not be experienced in such adult matters.

We’re talking about younger kids,” she told the newspaper. “They have questions they need answered on how to use them, when to use them.”

Please tell me that I'm not the only one that thinks these people have no business around children!

If you want to read the whole article about this whole sick mess click here.

Today's Time Waster

I saw the above posted to a friend's status today.  It's from some game called FrontierVille.  Now in all honesty I can't say that I have any knowledge about the game so I don't know how my friend managed to scare away that bear but my best guess is that she invited him to be a friend on FarmerVille, Mafia Wars and Pet Land.

Today's  Crazy Person

I'm sure we all have one of these...

Friend's Status:  I'm just not happy.
Someone Comments:  Why not? What's wrong?
Friend Comments:  I don't want to talk about it.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Southwest Airlines a Head Above The Rest

Today's Top News

Momma always said life was like a box on a plane you just never know what you're gonna find.

An unmarked box was found on a Southwest Airlines plane that contained human heads.  They gave a rough estimate that it was between 40 - 60 heads but we can't be sure since no body did a proper head count.  According to the news report the company shipping them didn't follow the correct procedures.  I imagine that the head of the company is going to be peeved and I bet heads are gonna roll!  Read more about it here.

Today's Top Deal

Taco Bell posted this today:  Print your coupon for a FREE Taco Bell Limeade Sparkler at Choice of Cherry or Classic Limeade. Get One Regular Size Drink. Limit One Per Person.

Since we were on the subject of flying, the idea popped into my head, that one of those little bottles of vodka like you get on the plane would go good in the above mentioned drink.

Today's Great Joke

You can only  imagine what a head trip it was seeing this joke posted the same day as the Southwest Airlines story.

How much does a brain cost?

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where a family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.

'I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news,' he said as he surveyed the worried faces.

'The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky, but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the BRAIN.'

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a time, someone asked,
'How much will a brain cost?'

The doctor quickly responded, '$5,000 for a male brain; $200 for a female brain.'

The moment turned awkward.

Some of the men actually had to'try' to not smile, avoiding eye contact with the women.

A man unable to control his curiosity, finally blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, 'Why is the male brain so much more than a female brain?'

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, 'It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to price the female brains a lot lower because they've been used.'

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Mittens for Devils

Today's Top News

Would you believe me if I told you that people in hell are on the internet right now ordering coats, hats and mittens!?  That's the first visual that popped in my head after seeing and hearing Keith Olbermann and Chris "thrill up my leg" Matthews compare Obama to Jimmy Carter and said things like, "I don't sense executive command."

I was full well expecting Rod Serling to jump out at any moment to tell me that I was in the Twilight Zone.

While I'm sure the people in hell are excited I'm sure the freeze won't last long.

Today's This Takes The Cake

I saw this cake posted and while I admire the craftsmanship I do wonder who ordered it?

Today's Great Quote

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~ Mark Twain

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

It's for The Children...

Today's Top News

I learned that Obama wants 50 billion, yup, that's all, just a mere little 50 billionIt's to close the gaps on some budgets here and there and as usual they are using that same old song and dance about how if we don't pony up we'll lose teachers and policemen.  Oh no!  We can't do that... please please congress give him the money!  How about this instead, that these idiots figure out another way to save some money!  I'm over here clippin' coupons and these fools have run up my personal liability as an American citizen for more than I owe on my house.

Now I'm thinking I need a drink!  Onward to better stuff. 

Today's Hot Product

Someone listed this great calendar today from the Houston Fire Fighters Children's Charity!  I could go on endlessly about this one.  Talk all about being hot, and hoses, and stuff but somehow I think most women won't need any prompting... After all, it's for the children.

Today's Temptation

Ok, you know your friends post something to their status and it's all you can do not to be a smart ass.  I remind myself constantly that I'm supposed to be a grown up and behave appropriately.  But I can share with you... :o)

Friend's Status - Had a dream about my wedding last night. ♥

To which I would have liked to reply... dream or nightmare?

Real World Update - Toshiba 1 - Orange Crush 0

If you follow my blog you know all about my laptop's run in with some Orange Crush.  My hubby took her apart to see what to salvage and cleaned some sticky off some connection, put her back together to see if she fired up and she did!!! Toshiba is alive and well!  I'm so thrilled!  :) 

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Puppy Love or Doggie Style?

Today's Top News

It seems that the NAACP thinks Hallmark has a racist card out there.  *raising an eyebrow* I had no idea that there were three K's at the end of HallmarKKK.  There are times when there should be true outrage and others when things are just outrageous.  The card says something about black holes and this offended some black women so Hallmark has pulled the card.  You can read all about it here.

Today's New Time Waster

One of my friend's posted about how she needed help for her seven year old, on some game, to unlock his pet.  She said it would take seven friends to help or that she feared he'd sneak her credit card to unlock the darn thing.  My first thought was that if one of my kids took a credit card without my permission they'd sooner want to live through Revelations than the wrath that would come from their mom!

Being the nice person I am though, I clicked it and found, Happy Pets.  It's some weird game where you get pets.  I had to feed them and scoop the litter box, now that was fun!  Then my pets grew and it was time to have some puppies!  Oh yeah, I get a screen asking me to give my pets some "love potion" and when I did a huge heart covered them up and some funky "love music" came on so my pets could get it on in private while I waited. 

I did a this screen capture. 

I'm surprised that the animal activists haven't gotten onto this game yet.  Is this responsible breading?  Didn't Bob Barker want us to spay and neuter our pets? 

Today's History Lesson

"Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!" - President Ronald Reagan - 23 years ago today

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Tinfoil Hat Zone - How to Make One and Why

Today's Top News

Get out those tinfoil hats boys and girls.  Now I know some of my friends are a bit off and extra colorful but they aren't that far out so I was surprised to see this article posted about a national coup d'etat rumored for sometime in late summer or early fall.  You know the left use to say the same thing about W. 

But just in case you think this may happen, right after you stock up on the ammo, you can go here to learn how to construct your very own tinfoil hat.

To find out even more about tinfoil hats you can always visit the Urban Dictionary which is one of my favorite sites.

Today's Dose of Wisdom

I learned today that The Star Spangled Banner had more that the first part to it.  I'm amazed and embarrassed.  So, I call my mom and tell her and she says, "Ok, you didn't know that?" Well what does that tell her about her parenting.  What kind of American was she bringing me up to be anyways.  Just in case you are "out there" like me and didn't know it below are the lyrics and a video of some guy singing the other part, you know that part I didn't know.  He did a good job too!

O! say can you see by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming,
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there;
O! say does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore, dimly seen through the mists of the deep,
Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
In full glory reflected now shines in the stream:
'Tis the star-spangled banner, O! long may it wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion,
A home and a country should leave us no more!
Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave:
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand
Between their loved home and the war's desolation!
Blest with victory and peace, may the heav'n rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation.
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust."
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

Today's Great Status

Going to church doesn't make you a christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

It's T&A Day! Did Palin Get Implants? Did Obama Figure Out Who's Ass to Kick?

Today's Top News

Facebook is a buzzing with rumors that Sarah Palin had a boob job. (o)(o)  I guess the rumor started on twitter and ended up here, there, and on Facebook of course. The rumor has been deflated though but if you care to read more  here is the story about Palin's ta-tas. 

I'm extra thankful today though since it seems the media is so observant that male politicians don't wear spandex shorts.

Today's Bit O' Trivia

The first time a toilet flush was heard on the movie screen was in the movie Psycho in 1960. 

Today's Cartoon

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Become one of my BFFs on FB!

It's Either The Late, Late Edition or The Early Edition

Today's Top News

Let's start with yesterday's top news.  It's not news from the big world out there, it's from my world.   My laptop is dead may it rest in peace!  Come to find out it had a bad reaction when one of my darling children gave it some orange soda.  Turns out it was allergic but while I'm pretty sure it was painful, it was a quick death.  It did have a donor card so that other laptops will be able to live longer.  While I know other laptops will benefit it will be hard to put pieces of my old friend on eBay and then box them up and send them out.  I know that is what it would have wanted though.

Below is a picture of the murderer.  It's just outrageous how he stands there all out front as the gang leader talking about crushing things... My heart has been crushed for sure, a dear part of my life taken from me.

*The name and picture of the accomplice will not be released due to him being a minor.

Today's Great Status

"thepenisinmymouth".. Did you read the pen is in my mouth?.. like hell you did ;)

Well I thought it was a good one!

Today's Dose of Wisdom

The purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.  **Please see Today's Top News!

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Become one of my FB BFFs.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Friend Me You Might Like It!

Today's Top News

Well it all seems pretty depressing... as my grandmother use to say it looks like we're going to hell in a hand basket. 

So, here is some good news! I have a new Facebook page and I want you to be my friend... yes that means I might quote you... but I'll never use your name.  I might make fun of you.... but again I'll never use your name! C'mon it'll be fun!  Here's my page just send me a friend request! 

Today's Best Status

"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than liked for who I'm not."

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Sharing isn't always a good thing!

Today's Top News

The most interesing news today was about how the good old government wants to put it's hand in your pockets some more to save the "media".   They talk about making tax exemptions for the media outlets and then also taxing electronics to pay for this.  If the media in our country wasn't skewed enough, why would we want our government involved in it?  I can't even find anything funny about this... You can read more about it here.

On another note... Friday is National Donut Day!  Sounds like my kind of day for sure!

Today's Top Status

I'm not even going to quote it as I usually do. This one only qualifies for the top because I can't get it out of my head.  One of my friends is talking about having yellowing stinky toe nails.  What the hell?  Why would you share that?  WHY?

Today's Chain Status

This one is going around now... I liked it for sure!

Did you know?

1. You cannot stick your tongue out and look up at the ceiling at the same time
2. All idiots, after reading #1 will try it.
3. And discover #1 is a lie.
4. You are smiling now because you are an idiot.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Global Warming Leads to Nudity

Today's Top News

As most of you have probably heard, Tipper and Al Gore are getting divorced after 40 years of marriage.  It does leave me wondering who will get the new place in California that is sure to be underwater within years with the Earth's temperature rising and all. With that said, one might think that global warming might have something to do with their breakup. I mean, you know, when it gets hotter, tempers get short.  Or maybe the heat caused Al to walk around in his underwear, or worse, in nothing at all, and Tipper became repulsed.  But nnnooo, that's not it at all. According to CBS News, it's George W. Bush's fault!   No, really, you can read all about it here.

And yes you are welcome for the Al Gore visual. :oP

Today's Interesting Status

"It’s called the 'grey fallacy.' One person says 'black,' another says 'white,' and people assume the truth is somewhere in the middle. But this is sloppy, lazy thinking. Just because someone takes a position that is diametrically opposed to the truth does not skew the truth in his direction. The truth is still the truth."

You can ponder on that one awhile!

Today's Fan Page

Because I'm such a caring mom I suggested this page to my children.  With over 150k fans I see that I'm not the only "mean mom" out there.   

i eat ramen noodles when my mom wont feed me

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Real Life Zombie Stuff, Plastic Guys, and Something to Think About

Today's Top News

Ok, I hope you aren't eating!  I found out today that there is contaminated cocaine floating around out there.  They are saying this stuff can cause a person's skin to rot!  Sounds like something right out of one of those sci-fi flicks huh! Just another reason to "just say no" kids.  You can read more about it here.

Today's Buzz (Lightyear)

Facebook is buzzing with the anticipation of Toy Story 3.  If you were a little girl that loved Barbies and had a Ken doll... you'll love this!

Today's Great Quote

Ignorance and prejudice are both two way streets. 

Monday, May 31, 2010

I'm Back!

Fear not my followers... while I took a break from here I never stopped checking Facebook several times a day.  I'm still addicted! If only I were as dedicated to my blogging as I am to Facebook.  So, incase you were wondering where I've been... well that's a long boring story so we'll just skip it and get back to business.

Today's Top News

Apparently there was a "protest" today which involved deleting your Facebook page because, people are all kinds of upset that they aren't private enough.  My advice, don't post stupid stuff on the internet... That's not just for Facebook either people that is for every website!  All I can say is that those who actually deleted their page can't even be hardcore addicts. For more info on this protest you can go here.

In other news, as we remember those that gave all and their families and loved ones that had their lives changed forever so that we may live the best life ever in these United States, I found that some of those who serve have four feet!  Paws up for the Military Dogs!  Read all about them here. 

Today's Weird Status

"I'm so confused....... they're up, they're down, but as long as she's happy I'm ok."

Ok, what?  This post makes it clear that confusion can be contagious.  I'm lost and GPS can't map a route to Whatthehelldoesthatmean, USA. 

Today's Great Quote

“It only stands to reason that where there’s sacrifice, there’s someone collecting the sacrificial offerings. Where there’s service, there is someone being served. The man who speaks to you of sacrifice is speaking of slaves and masters, and intends to be the master.” - Ayn Rand

What did you learn on Facebook today?


Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Can You Grow Weed on Farmville?

Today's Top News

Do two wrongs make a right?  It seems that the guy that does the voice work for Geico lashed out a Freedom Works and called the people of the tea party movement retards.  He said he did it because the tea party people yelled things about Rep. Barney Franks being gay even though it was never proven.  In the end the guy got fired, axed, let go.  You can read all about it here if you so choose.

Today's Best Status

 Ya know, I was just wondering!! Can ya grow weed on Farmville and sell it on Mafia wars???

Today's Chain Status

Please copy and paste this to your status if you know someone, or have been affected by someone who needs a smack upside the head. People who need a smack upside the head affect the lives of many. There is still no known cure for someone who deserves a smack upside the head, except a smack upside the head, but we can raise awareness. Many won't copy and paste this. I did. Will you?

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Pictures and Places

Today's News

The Health Care debate is in full swing today on Facebook and people are fired up!  The ones opposed to this bill are posting the Kill the Bill picture as their profile picture.  From what I can tell it's spreading like wildfire.  I'd be interested in knowing if any of your friends are posting this as well.

Today's Chain Status

Todays game - PLACE OF BIRTH! Everyone please play! You will find it interesting to know where your FB friends birth places are. Copy & paste this on your profile, then put your place of birth at the end of this sentence .....

Today's Fan Page

Today I ran across a fan page from one of my very favorite sites, The People of Walmart.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Zoos, Farms, and Animal Crap

Today's Top News

I guess it was a beautiful day in most parts of the good ol' U.S.A. because many of my friends were either barbecuing or going to the zoo. There was also real news but it sucks and since it's such a beautiful day I chose not to talk about it.  :o) 

Today's Cause

There are great causes all over Facebook for things like breast cancer awareness, support our troops but once again Farmville strikes again.  There is actually a cause so that they will add sending fuel as a gift.  569k members have signed up for this cause!

Today's Joke

Obama, speaking at a 6th grade class asked ,What Changes Should I Make To America,1st question, A horse, cow,and deer all eat grass. Yet a deer craps little pellets,a cow a flat patty,a horse, clumps of dried grass. Why is that? Obama, surprised thinks a second and finally says,Hmm, I have no idea!and the kid says -Do... you really feel qualified to change America when you don't know sh*t!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

1.4% Raise, Bringin' Home The Bacon, and Taxes

Today's Top News

You know there is so much about politics that it just makes my head spin sometimes.  The biggest hubbub of the day came about from Obama proposing a 1.4% raise for our military.  I don't know about you but it does sound like a pretty crappy raise when those fools in congress and senate make so much money... I mean they make some boneheaded decisions, waste our money on all sorts of things we don't need and pay way too much for things we do need. Yet our military men and women work hard, some are separated from their families and are in harms way and wow... you know what they make? Not enough!  It's not like anyone signs up for that as a way to get rich quick. God bless our military and I hope those fools do better by them than that.

And that's all I've got to say about that.

Today's Great Status

One of my female friends posted about how she did some work on the sprinkler system and how she was feeling all empowered.  All I could think of was that old Enjoli commerical.

Today's Great Quote

You know,a fine is a tax for doing wrong and a tax is a fine for doing well.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Miss me?

I've been really slacking when it comes to my Facebook addiction.  One I've had lots going on, I do have five children and a husband and sometimes I actually have to pay attention to them. :o)  Two my friends have just been boring me to tears.  Enough excuses let's get down to business.

Today's Top News

Gov. Rick Perry wins!  Perry won the Republican primary today and (while I didn't hear it from my friends) Bill White won the primary for the Democratic Party.   Many of my friends are supporters of Debra Medina and according to them anyone that voted for Perry was stupid and ignorant at best.  Oh well, if the shoe was on the other foot I'm sure Perry supporters would have been talking trash too!

Today's Chain Status

It's movie line week on Facebook. Copy and paste this into your status and in the comment box, write your favorite line from a movie and see how many people know the movie and the line.

Today's Great Status

On a serious note I really liked this status and thought it was thought provoking.

What you focus on is what your team will focus on. Are you moving from point A to point B in a straight line? Or are you all over the place? Something to think about.

Let's hope my friends provide me with better stuff tomorrow or I'm going to have to post that thing about my grannies boobs. 

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Olberman Owned, Gift Cards, and Not So Nice Thoughts

Today's Top News

Someone posted a video from The Dallas Tea Party today.... it is basically their answer to Keith Olberman asking where all the people of color are at the Tea Parties.  I have to admit, Keith got owned!

Today's Pondering

I see people posting all these so and so entered to win a $100 Lowe's gift card... or whatever store.  I wonder if that is a legit thing but I see it lots everyday and have not heard of any of my friends winning.  How about you?

Today's Evil Thought

It was a slow day on Facebook.  I guess the crops have come in and there are way to many people busy with the harvest.  So, I was trying to think of some weird kind of status message I could post and wondering if it was odd enough how many responses I would get..  So, feel free to leave a comment and I might just post it to see how it goes over.  I was almost thinking about telling everyone that my 85 year old grandmother had her boobs done and that I had pictures....  :) 

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Monday, February 22, 2010

All Heart, Jungle Love, and BFF Stuff

Today's New Story

It seems that Dick Cheney is in the hospital with chest pains.  I read that he has already had four heart attacks and a triple bypass.  Proof I guess that the man has a heart although the majority of people feel otherwise  To show heart here, a prayer for him and his family.

On a local note it's suppose to snow here again in Dallas... a rare event indeed.  So, like a week and a half ago all my local friends are talking snow, snow, snow.   

Today's New Time Waster

It seems there is a new, well new to me, game that my friends are playing called Jungle Extreme.  I guess it's like Farmville jungle style.  I understand that it's fun to play games.  I even admit to having my own farm on Farmtown.  I don't play it much but when I do, I don't post everything I do on the farm to my wall.  Posting these things on your wall let's your friends know that you have no life.  I personally like to keep up appearances on Facebook as if I have more important things to do.

Today's Great Status

To prove while I'm sarcastic, a.k.a. smart ass, I do have a heart.  I thought this was a great message.

Always give a friend a safe place to cry and never be the reason they need to.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Ron Paul, Tiger Woods and Liberals

Today's Top News

Ron Paul won the CPAC Straw Poll? Huh?

Today's Great Status

Just heard Tiger Woods and Toyota are going to team up for a comeback..their slogan: "I swear we can stop"

Today's Great Joke

Ya know what you call a basement full of Liberals----A whine cellar.:o)

* On a less funny note - I apologize for the lack of updates.  My son broke his leg playing in the snow last week so I've been a bit busy with more important stuff. I hope to get back to my more regular posting soon. 

Monday, February 15, 2010

Statues, Time Wasters, and Punctuation

Today's Top News

I found out today about Indonesia having a statue of Obama as a child. You can read all about it here.

Today's Great Status

warns you that reading this status may result in having wasted several seconds reading this status for nothing.

Today's Fan Page

I have found the perfect fan page for my mother.  She calls me all the time to tell me about all the mistakes on my blog.  The woman is so obsessed with grammar and punctuation, that she took her a newsletter she received from the company that she worked for marked it up with a red pen, and sent it back to themI'm sure a phone call will be coming after she reads this post as well.  Hi mom!

If people like me drive you crazy with their lackadaisical attitude when it comes to grammar and punctuation this fan page is for you,  'Let's eat Grandma!' or, 'Let's eat, Grandma!' Punctuation saves lives.

My New Idea

I think that we should start one of those chain status deals and I have an idea for it to see how far we can get it around Facebook.  I'll announce it when we have 100 fans on our page so join up by clicking the Facebook widget on the sidebar and becoming a fan.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Friday, February 12, 2010

Ramenaire, Cherubs and a Celebrity Goat

Today's Top News

I learned about this guy that was just so miserable being a millionaire that he was getting rid of all his things and money to feel better.  Now I've never been a millionaire so I'm not so sure about how I would feel about that but I know it's not very pleasant to not have any money either in fact it just plain sucks.  I've been through times in my life, and I'm sure many others have too, that I like to call the "Ramen Era" I guess at that point I was a ramenaire.

What truly made me curious about this article is that it only mentioned his wife one time and it didn't mention how she felt about giving all the money away.  Did she take her half and leave or is she all in on this?

Today's Great Status

...thinks Valentines Day is a little scary...I mean come on... some fat toddler with wings chasing you with a weapon?? That's some scary "Chuckie" stuff!!

Hmm, I never really thought about it like that.

Today's Fan Page

Vote Goat! Can this Goat get more fans than Barack Obama?  This fan page is closing in on one million fans so I'll be keeping an eye on this one. *Update I just check the fan page and it only has 125k I guess my friend was wrong. 

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Broken Records, Coffee Jell-O, and Pink Cows

Today's News

Today was Sarah Palin's birthday she is 46.

I learned that Debra Medina, candidate for governor of Texas, said something that may make people believe that she is a 9-11 "truther" 

We had a record breaking snow fall in Dallas, TX today.

Today's Recipe

Coffee Jell-O - I don't know about this one.  I'm a huge fan of coffee not so much of Jell-O.  But if you are curious and/or wanna give it a try you can find it here:  If you do decide to make this please come back and comment on this post so we can all know how it was!

Today's Fan Page

I don't care about your farm, or your fish, or your park, or your mafia!!!  With over 1.6  million fans that wish there friends wouldn't post there every thing they do on their games on the wall... we just don't care that you found a pink cow.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Feelin' The Love

Today's Top News

The Obama Administration will be honoring the 43rd President of the United States by naming the gap between the tectonic plates beneath Haiti after him. The area will now officially be referred to as "Bush's Fault".

Ok, so it's not a real news story but all the ones that were posted today weren't really worth repeating.  More snow yadda, yadda... more campaign news, yawn... so, you see the news I posted while not true seemed much more interesting. :o)

Today's Best Status

Sometimes you just have to love your friend's twisted thoughts...

Finally got it figured out! We've come up with a solution to all the controversy over full-body scanners at airports. Have a booth that you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you. It would be a win-win for everyone, and there would be no nonsense about racial profiling!!!!!

Today's Chain Status

We talked about love being in the air for Valentines and now this is going around Facebook...

It's Valentine's Week on Facebook. Change your profile picture to a picture of you with your significant other and tell us how long you've been together.

Just another way this time of year to make your lonely single friends feel like crap to see all the couples all smiling in their pictures.  Yup, yup!

*Disclaimer - The couple in the picture is not one of my actual friends on Facebook but rather just some random couple like the ones that you get in a frame when you buy it at the store.  

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

I have to hand it to Sarah Palin

Today's Top News

Sarah Palin has started a trend after writing notes on her hand.  A good number of my friends now have profile pictures of their hand with varying notes on it.  Even White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs had to get in on the action by showing off notes he had written on his hand during today's press briefing.  The words on his hand included Hope and Change... I guess those two haven't been checked off the list yet.

Today's New Facebook Look B*tch

Most people just really don't like change (which just shocks the hell out of me that Obama got voted in on that word, onto the real post now) until people get use to the new look of Facebook again, we can just expect a fair amount of bitching.  So, today the big one was somebody had a hard time locating their Farmville gifts.. now we've talked about how this farming thing is addictive and I'm sure it was very upsetting to this person.  :o)

Today's Sweet Love

It's almost Valentine's day and there is love in the air on Facebook. One of my friends wrote all mushy, mushy about how her husband was the best in the world.  The only thing I could think is... sure until tomorrow when he pisses you off.  I know I'm such a romantic.

 What did you learn on Facebook today?

Monday, February 8, 2010

Palm Readings Now the Media is Psychic

Today's Top News

Well it seems today that in the news there are a big brew ha ha about Palin having notes written on her hand.  The media acted as if she had been cheating on her SAT's or something but the average Joes around Facebook are laughing at the media and how they could even compare that to a teleprompter.  One of my friends posted this picture, if anyone wants to do a palm reading. Palm reading... LOL LOL LOL

I personally write notes on my hand all the time.  I've always thought that if I lost my hand whatever was written on it would be the least of my worries!

Today's Great Message

No I don't always have to be snarky. hehe  I thought this was a great message, really... 

What you do for others you are doing for yourself. That can work both ways so be sure what you are doing for others is kind, loving, forgiving, supporting. Another way to say it would be What you put out comes back to you double!

Today's Sad Goodbye

For the first time since I've been on Facebook I had to learn how to ax a friend off my list.  Lots of my friends talk politics and I think it's pretty informative but this lady, if I should call her a lady, has some really obnoxious things to say that are way out of line.  I'm not for being all PC but I'm definitely for not acting like a total crazy person.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

P.S. My spell check is not working and I can hardly spell my own name so please forgive me. In other words don't get all snarky with the "spell check use it" comments. Thanks.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Who dat? Super Bowl Edition

Today's Top News

Of course there was talk about the Super Bowl all day today on Facebook?  I did have a question though... why is 'Who dat?' ok to say in our very PC world? Anyone, anyone?

Today's Funny Stuff

I'm laughing hard about all the comments about The Who playing for the halftime show.  Half the people don't know who the heck The Who is and the other half are making fun of these really old guys jammin' out.  I know I thought the lead singer looked like he needed an oxygen tank rolled out at any minute.

Today's Opinions

From what I can tell the baby E*Trade commercials where the favorite among my friends.

What did you learn about the Super Bowl on Facebook today?

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Funny Pictures Edition

Today I thought I would share a few of the great pictures I've gotten from my friends on Facebook.  I might do this every so often as I have a whole folder full of funny pictures and cartoons on my computer!


Thursday, February 4, 2010

Corps, Corpse, Tomayto, Tamahto

Let me start off by saying that I'm so so happy to have the internet again!  That was a rough couple of days and as crazy as it sounds I was thinking about a disaster and what if we all didn't have internet. (insert doom and gloom scary music here!)  What would we do without it?  I know it's very painful to think about. :oP

Next time I go on vacation I'm finding out where this place is!

Today's Top News

According to President Obama at the National Prayer Breakfast we have a 'corpse' man in the Navy.  I would say he pronounced corps wrong but who am I to say? I went to community college and he went to Harvard.  Here's the video.

I also learned today that my state senator is for increasing the tax on fuel by ten cents a gallon and since I'm against using profanity on my blog I won't say anymore on that subject.

Today's Well That's Interesting

People have started posting on their profile It's Doppelganger week. Please change your profile picture to someone famous (actor, musician, athlete, etc) you have been told you look like. Then re-post this message.  Sadly, I didn't participate in this because I have never been told I look like anyone.

Today's Great Quote

Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Monday, February 1, 2010

My New Facebook Friend and Some Highway Robbery

Today's News

I'll tell you this will be short and sweet since I'm typing it on my crackberry which by the way is the only way I can get to Facebook.You see I'm out of town and not without my laptop but the hotel I'm at wants $11.95 per day for me to connect to their internet. That monkey just ain't gonna dance... Or in other words I'm not going to pay that much when I can get it on my phone it's not high quality but it works. I guess I could compare it to looking for long butts when you are out of cigarettes.

Onward to my new friend. My kids send a stuff Pokemon with me when I go out of town then I take pics of him to post on Facebook for the kids. When I was taking a pic of said @okemon with the frontdesk lady she thought it was fun and is now my newest FB friend. Facebook bringing the world together. LOL

Pray that in the morning I can find a hotspot or I'm going to have to start begging for tips or something so I can have mobile internet. Remember kids it,s the simple things in life and wireless internet that makes us most happy.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Farmville Addicts Dr. Phil is Talking to You!

You know how hard I was laughing this morning when I visited the Yahoo homepage and found this story and video!

So, I headed over to Facebook to see if I couldn't find a Fan Page and sure enough here ya go Farmville Addicts for people who are looking to hook up with other farmers. But if you are ready to give up your farm and get a life... still on Facebook of course you can join the Farmville Addicts 12 Step Program group.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

You Say It Best When You Say Nothing At All


Today's Top News

As I predicted yesterday Obama's State of The Union was the big news of the day.  Most people were totally shocked that he fired up his campaign bus and ran over the Supreme Court Judges with it. 

Some of the comments posted about the SOTU address I can't repeat as they aren't mom approved... not as bad as sucking on a bar of Lifeboy soap like Ralph had to do in the movie A Christmas Story, but bad enough.

Just to be fair I'll add that, I did one of those things on Facebook a couple of months ago that gives a percentage for your friends like how many are single or married.  I found back then that my friends are a little over 60% Republican.  So, I can't really say what I read is fair and balanced like say Fox News.  I will say though that my friends that are Democrats have quieted and have for the most part stopped defending Obama.  

Today's Fun Stuff

Have you seen the Geico commercial where the old man has that catchy funny ringtone, ringity-ding-ding-dingy-dong, on his cell phone? Today someone posted a link and you can go download the ringtone for free.   If you haven't seen the commercial, it's here on the same page you can get the ringtone from.

Today's Fun Status 

Please put this on your status if you know someone (or are related to someone) who has been eaten by dragons. My wish for 2010 is that people will understand, that being eaten by dragons is not something to be ashamed of. Dragons are nearly unstoppable and are truly terrifying. 93% won't copy and paste this... They have been eaten by dragons.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

On a More Serious Note...

I missed posting here yesterday due to a family life threatening emergency.  From this I learned that prayer can spread like wild fire on Facebook. I told one friend of the problem, she posted it on her FB page and before I knew it mutual friends were praying, their friends were praying and their friends.  It was an incredible and heart  touching gesture.  Now today the person that was held in prayer is doing excellent given the circumstances.

On a lighter note... after the State of The Union address by Obama and the rebuttal by Gov. McDonnell, I'm sure I'll have plenty of fodder tomorrow.   

Monday, January 25, 2010

Reading is Fundamental - This is Your Brain on Cupcakes

Today's Top News

I learned that President Obama took his teleprompter to an elementary school to do a speech... proving that you don't need to know what to say as long as it's all typed up for you.

Today's Interesting Link

I'm not so sure about brain slug cupcakes. I'm not sure why they were a big hit today around Facebook. I'm sure they are yummy though even if I would feel the need to close my eyes before eating one or maybe to do that sorta look off to the side thing!

You can read more about the brain slug cupcakes here.

Today's Word of The Day

I've told you before that Facebook can be educational.  I learned a new word today.  It's something I've done, probably something you've done and what I can whip out and call my kids on in the future sometime when I think they are doing it.  If I do call my kids this then I'm going to make them go to the trouble of looking it up rather than just tell them.

So, here it is....

Main Entry: malinger

Function: intransitive verb
Inflected Form(s): ma·lin·gered; ma·lin·ger·ing
Etymology: French malingre sickly
Date: 1820
: to pretend or exaggerate incapacity or illness (as to avoid duty or work)

What did you learn on Facebook today?



Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...