Keepin' It Two Thirds Clean & Classy

Today's Top News

Remember the uproar when Elvis was thrusting his pelvis around?  Ok, me either, not first hand anyways.  Well, fast forward and here to kick off 2013, Kathy Griffin has taken TV to a whole new level by giving Anderson Cooper's "sack" (her words, not mine) a smooch on CNN's live New Year's Eve broadcast.  I wonder if she missed the announcement that he's gay?
You can see the whole twisted thing here.


Today's Top Status

"Learn how to make your own dishwasher detergent! It's Easy Peasy!"

See that! Who'd a thought I'd wake up this morning to find out I could make my own dishwasher detergent?   If you'd like to learn how here's the link.

Today's Top Picture

Perhaps someone could share this one with Kathy....

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Drink Up The Facebook Fun!

Today's Top News

We'll be seeing one more game of The World Series after the Texas Rangers lose game six.

As most of you know I am in Texas so most of my friends are in Texas or are from Texas and the whole page is full of Texas Rangers posts.  The World Series ups and downs played out right there on the wall.  Who needs to go to the bar to feel like your watching the game with friends?


Today's Top Status


"OTB!!!!! Occupy The Bar !!! Much more fun and probably more constructive;-)))" - I couldn't have said it better myself!

Today's Top Picture

Here's a great set of Halloween Costumes!

What did you learn on Facebook today?

It's All About Paws....

Today's Top News

"Former Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty dropped out of the race for the GOP presidential nomination on Sunday, hours after finishing a disappointing third in the Iowa straw poll."  - The Blaze

Tim Who?  I actually know who he is but I can't blame him for dropping out because Snuggie™ actually has more Facebook fans than Tim Pawlenty does.

Today's Top Quote

"If you look at a dog and not feel vicarious excitement and affection, you must be a cat!" ~ Anonymous :)

Today's Top Video

I'm not usually big on the videos but I had to share this one.



What did you learn on Facebook today?

A Sign of The Times

Today's Top News

Budget talks blah, blah, blah.  On the lighter side, I found this story posted on Facebook about one of those DOT road signs.  Apparently Sony isn't the only place being hacked lately.  Someone hacked an illuminated highway sign on a North Carolina highway and had it display the phrase "Impeach Obama".  The problem has been corrected... well the sign anyway.  Click here to read the whole story.

 
Today's Top Quote

"Just because the past taps you on the shoulder, doesn't mean you have to look back."

 Today's Farm Report

I've reported on lots of Farmville activity in the past but today it dawned on me that I haven't had any of my friends posting farm pictures or begging for farm gifts.  I guess the great depression and the dust bowl hit so, people are leaving behind the farm in search of work at factories.  If they can't get a job at the factory, they can at least sell their goods to the UAW Chrysler Workers. 

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Love Pats Coming to a Mall Near You?

Today's Top News

I learned today that the counter terrorism guys are saying that we are possibly going to get our butt kicked for us offing Osama. They think they will target places like the malls and stuff like that, they called them soft targets. I had several thoughts on this.

1. If something happens this would not be good for Obama's poll numbers especially after he was all peacockin' it up, saying he gave the order to kill Osama.

2. If the government puts a bunch of guards with like M-16's in the malls and they are doing the whole TSA thing just so you can go in and buy some shizit, sales are going to hit rock bottom.

3. If a mall does get attacked, online retailers are going to bonus, however, this would not be a good thing for the jobs numbers. Our country would begin to look like a military state. Would that make us land of the watched and home of the felt up?

4. The government would have to create a new agency to watch the malls etc. and feel people up at the door so, let me be the first to propose, U.P.R.A.S.S. - United Patrol Regiment Association of Shopping Security.  

5. Note to Uncle Sam if you are so flippin' worried about our malls why don't you start watching our borders! And I'm not talking about the book stores!


To read about what the counter terrorism "experts" are saying click here.


Today's Top Picture

Here's a lmao picture of Osama Bin Laden's Facebook status. :)

Today's Top Quote

Don't let failure go to your heart, and don't let success go to your head." Will Smith

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Imam vs. Obama, Cupcakes and Other Good Stuff

Today's Top News

So I guess there is some guy called, imam (I think that is "Emom" I don't think it's like ipod) and this guy is super pissed that we killed Osama and he wants revenge! He said, "The western dogs are rejoicing after killing one of our Islamic lions. From Al-Aqsa Mosque, where the future caliphate will originate with the help of God, we say to them – the dogs will not rejoice too much for killing the lions. The dogs will remain dogs and the lion, even if he is dead, will remain a lion."

He went on to talk some more stuff about hanging Obama and Bush Junior. For the full twisted story click here.

Today's Show Off

Ok you know all of you have at least one friend on Facebook that has to be all perfect.  I have lots of them.  Sadly, I know most of them really well so they aren't foolin' me any.  I like how they are all trying to out do themselves though for Teacher Appreciation Week at school.  They are just busy, busy, busy whippin' up cookies and cupcakes!  I, on the other hand, like to give gift cards, they are calorie free and don't make a mess in my kitchen. :)

Today's Great Quote

With all the twisted news about the crazy people wanting to destroy the "Western Dogs" I thought we needed something a bit uplifting, more on the happy side.

Everyday may not be a good day - But there is something good in everyday!  Go find the good.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

There's Nerdy and Then There's Genius

Today's Top News

If you hadn't heard, Rev. Al Sharpton had a rally this weekend in D.C. as a counter to another rally Glenn Beck had.  From what I understand, one had lots of black folks and one had lots of white folks.  This is surprising since Obama was supposed to bring our nation together more.  But it doesn't matter what color Obama's skin is because someone dressed him up like a white boy and put a bicycle helmet on him.  Seriously?  Where in the hell was Michelle?  I want to know what kind of wife lets her husband leave the house dressed like a dork. Obama made me think of something we used to say in the 80's, "You're ugly and your mama dresses you funny!"


Today's Great Quote

"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character." -Albert Einstein

Today's Great Quiz

Today I took the 'How nerdy is your name?' quiz and my result was 66% nerdy.  I guess that's not too bad since my mom got my name from a fictional senator's wife on some soap opera.

Lady GAGa, Sir Churchill, & Jet Setting

Today's Top News

I learned today that Lady Gaga is against Arizona's new immigration law.  I wonder now if one can just go into one of her concerts?  If she doesn't think you need a passport, why should you need a ticket?

On another note...  I know going to the dentist can be really expensive but would you pay 24k for a used set of teeth?  Well someone did, granted they were Churchill's but really EWWWWW!


Today's Great Quote

"Life's tough.......it's even tougher if you're stupid." - John Wayne

Today's Awesome Video

Mittens for Devils

Today's Top News

Would you believe me if I told you that people in hell are on the internet right now ordering coats, hats and mittens!?  That's the first visual that popped in my head after seeing and hearing Keith Olbermann and Chris "thrill up my leg" Matthews compare Obama to Jimmy Carter and said things like, "I don't sense executive command."

I was full well expecting Rod Serling to jump out at any moment to tell me that I was in the Twilight Zone.




While I'm sure the people in hell are excited I'm sure the freeze won't last long.

Today's This Takes The Cake

I saw this cake posted and while I admire the craftsmanship I do wonder who ordered it?


Today's Great Quote

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~ Mark Twain

Puppy Love or Doggie Style?

Today's Top News

It seems that the NAACP thinks Hallmark has a racist card out there.  *raising an eyebrow* I had no idea that there were three K's at the end of HallmarKKK.  There are times when there should be true outrage and others when things are just outrageous.  The card says something about black holes and this offended some black women so Hallmark has pulled the card.  You can read all about it here.


Today's New Time Waster

One of my friend's posted about how she needed help for her seven year old, on some game, to unlock his pet.  She said it would take seven friends to help or that she feared he'd sneak her credit card to unlock the darn thing.  My first thought was that if one of my kids took a credit card without my permission they'd sooner want to live through Revelations than the wrath that would come from their mom!

Being the nice person I am though, I clicked it and found, Happy Pets.  It's some weird game where you get pets.  I had to feed them and scoop the litter box, now that was fun!  Then my pets grew and it was time to have some puppies!  Oh yeah, I get a screen asking me to give my pets some "love potion" and when I did a huge heart covered them up and some funky "love music" came on so my pets could get it on in private while I waited. 

I did a this screen capture. 

I'm surprised that the animal activists haven't gotten onto this game yet.  Is this responsible breading?  Didn't Bob Barker want us to spay and neuter our pets? 

Today's History Lesson

"Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!" - President Ronald Reagan - 23 years ago today


What did you learn on Facebook today?

Real Life Zombie Stuff, Plastic Guys, and Something to Think About

Today's Top News

Ok, I hope you aren't eating!  I found out today that there is contaminated cocaine floating around out there.  They are saying this stuff can cause a person's skin to rot!  Sounds like something right out of one of those sci-fi flicks huh! Just another reason to "just say no" kids.  You can read more about it here.


Today's Buzz (Lightyear)

Facebook is buzzing with the anticipation of Toy Story 3.  If you were a little girl that loved Barbies and had a Ken doll... you'll love this!



Today's Great Quote

Ignorance and prejudice are both two way streets. 

I'm Back!

Fear not my followers... while I took a break from here I never stopped checking Facebook several times a day.  I'm still addicted! If only I were as dedicated to my blogging as I am to Facebook.  So, incase you were wondering where I've been... well that's a long boring story so we'll just skip it and get back to business.

Today's Top News

Apparently there was a "protest" today which involved deleting your Facebook page because, people are all kinds of upset that they aren't private enough.  My advice, don't post stupid stuff on the internet... That's not just for Facebook either people that is for every website!  All I can say is that those who actually deleted their page can't even be hardcore addicts. For more info on this protest you can go here.

In other news, as we remember those that gave all and their families and loved ones that had their lives changed forever so that we may live the best life ever in these United States, I found that some of those who serve have four feet!  Paws up for the Military Dogs!  Read all about them here. 

Today's Weird Status

"I'm so confused....... they're up, they're down, but as long as she's happy I'm ok."

Ok, what?  This post makes it clear that confusion can be contagious.  I'm lost and GPS can't map a route to Whatthehelldoesthatmean, USA. 

Today's Great Quote

“It only stands to reason that where there’s sacrifice, there’s someone collecting the sacrificial offerings. Where there’s service, there is someone being served. The man who speaks to you of sacrifice is speaking of slaves and masters, and intends to be the master.” - Ayn Rand

What did you learn on Facebook today?






 

Palm Readings Now the Media is Psychic

Today's Top News

Well it seems today that in the news there are a big brew ha ha about Palin having notes written on her hand.  The media acted as if she had been cheating on her SAT's or something but the average Joes around Facebook are laughing at the media and how they could even compare that to a teleprompter.  One of my friends posted this picture, if anyone wants to do a palm reading. Palm reading... LOL LOL LOL

I personally write notes on my hand all the time.  I've always thought that if I lost my hand whatever was written on it would be the least of my worries!

Today's Great Message

No I don't always have to be snarky. hehe  I thought this was a great message, really... 

What you do for others you are doing for yourself. That can work both ways so be sure what you are doing for others is kind, loving, forgiving, supporting. Another way to say it would be What you put out comes back to you double! http://www.whereheavenandearthmeet.com

Today's Sad Goodbye

For the first time since I've been on Facebook I had to learn how to ax a friend off my list.  Lots of my friends talk politics and I think it's pretty informative but this lady, if I should call her a lady, has some really obnoxious things to say that are way out of line.  I'm not for being all PC but I'm definitely for not acting like a total crazy person.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

P.S. My spell check is not working and I can hardly spell my own name so please forgive me. In other words don't get all snarky with the "spell check use it" comments. Thanks.

Corps, Corpse, Tomayto, Tamahto

Let me start off by saying that I'm so so happy to have the internet again!  That was a rough couple of days and as crazy as it sounds I was thinking about a disaster and what if we all didn't have internet. (insert doom and gloom scary music here!)  What would we do without it?  I know it's very painful to think about. :oP

Next time I go on vacation I'm finding out where this place is!

Today's Top News

According to President Obama at the National Prayer Breakfast we have a 'corpse' man in the Navy.  I would say he pronounced corps wrong but who am I to say? I went to community college and he went to Harvard.  Here's the video.



I also learned today that my state senator is for increasing the tax on fuel by ten cents a gallon and since I'm against using profanity on my blog I won't say anymore on that subject.

Today's Well That's Interesting

People have started posting on their profile It's Doppelganger week. Please change your profile picture to someone famous (actor, musician, athlete, etc) you have been told you look like. Then re-post this message.  Sadly, I didn't participate in this because I have never been told I look like anyone.

Today's Great Quote

Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Sad Dems, Silly Drama, and Sexy Dames

Today's Top News

Look's like Scott Brown, candidate for the U.S. Senate seat in Massachusetts is ahead and I've heard that some pundits are calling it for him. It's shocking to see a true blue state vote red especially after President Obama just went there to push the vote.  It's always interesting to see the pendulum swing.  

Today's Drama

I think everyone should be wary of what they post to their wall.  It's all "out there" even if it seems private.  Today someone I know was talking smack about their employer which isn't smart or professional. It's all been deleted thank goodness.  But I saw it and who know who else did... we'll have to see how that one unfolds. They say don't drink and drive and I'd like to add don't get pissed and post, both of those are great advice kids!


Today's Quote of The Day

"I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe.






What did you learn on Facebook today?

If you can't grow 'em, buy 'em

Today's Top News

I learned today that the White House's veggies are as fake as Kellie Pickler's....

Well at any rate, the produce picked from Michelle Obama's garden for the Iron Chef show were not really from the garden at all. They used "stunt veggies".

All the world's a stage, and all the taters and broccoli are merely players.

Today's  Website


Someone posted this website http://www.raraahahahromaromamagagaoohlala.com I don't know why!  The site does have an ad for diabetic testing strips but I think that seizures would be more the target market here!

Today's Quote of The Day


Some 'get' it. Some won't. Don't waste time arguing with the ones that don't. Instead, engage the ones that do!

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Cheers & Jeers, Jargon & Jackets

Today's Top News Story

Cheers of joy and grumblings of loathing came up all over today as a story broke that former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin signed on to be a contributor on the Fox News Channel.  Fox News reported that Tuesday at 8p ET is her first official day on the job.

Today's Word of The Day

I saw a new word today that I didn't know.  It was used on a comment about the above story.  The comment said that Palin made liberals apoplectic.

From  http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary
Main Entry: ap·o·plec·tic
Pronunciation: \ˌa-pə-ˈplek-tik\
Function: adjective
Etymology: French or Late Latin; French apoplectique, from Late Latin apoplecticus, from Greek apoplēktikos, from apoplēssein
Date: 1611

1 : of, relating to, or causing stroke
2 : affected with, inclined to, or showing symptoms of stroke
3 : of a kind to cause or apparently cause stroke ; also : greatly excited or angered

Since I started this blog just less than a week ago I've added two new words to my vocabulary. The cool thing is that I can use them both in one single sentence. The assclowns in D.C. are making people all over the country feel apoplectic. I know you'll want to use that witty piece of work as your own during your next political conversation around the water cooler so, please feel free.

Today's Quote of The Day

"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
Now that is something that you can take into the New Year to stay on track... One day at a time.

Today's Fan Page

Did you have a mom that made you wear an ugly coat so you wouldn't freeze and you are still carrying harsh feelings about it? The cure could just be a click away on the I don't care how cold it is outside, I refuse to wear a big ugly coat fan page. Now you can join over 200,000, yes 200k, who would rather freeze their arse off than wear some tasteless garb.

Speaking of tasteless, have I mentioned this blog has it's very own fan page? Yes, yes, we do!  http://www.facebook.com/pages/What-I-learned-today/412326850541

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Stupid is as stupid does, Forrest's mom knew what she was talking about!

Today's Top News

There is a fine line between bravery and stupidity. In today's top news story I learned that protesting the wearing of leather at a biker rally might not be the smartest thing in the world to do. One of the protest organizers was quoted in the article, “Something just went wrong,” said a still visibly shaken organizer of the protest. “Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong.”  I know you are wondering about the rest of this story so just click here to read all about it.

Today's That Really Sucks

In the wee hours of the morning, one of the couples I know posted that they had just returned from their tropical vacation to below freezing temperatures here in Dallas. That does suck but it gets better. The airlines had lost their luggage. Ok, that sucks too but, I know you're thinking, so what, big deal! I present you now with the pièce de résistance, their car keys were packed in the lost luggage!

I know they made it home a couple of hours later.  There was no explanation of how though. I do wonder which one of them did it and if there are some frosty feelings from the event going on at their house today or if they are laughing about it.

This incident serves as a reminder, always put your most important things in your carry on bag.

Today's Great Quote

“We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.” ~ Benjamin Franklin
I can't help but think somehow this quote really sums up the day and found it funny that it was posted there just for me to add to my blog.  God works in mysterious ways. :o)

What did you learn on Facebook today?