Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Special Edition: State of The U.S. Economy

Found this one, this morning on Facebook and had to share!

The recession has hit everybody really hard...

My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.

CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.

I saw a Mormon with only one wife.

If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

And, finally....

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, all the wars, no jobs for 1/10th of the nation, my savings, Social Security, my 401K AND retirement funds, etc.;

I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.

What did you learn on Facebook today?

Sunday, August 14, 2011

It's All About Paws....

Today's Top News

"Former Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty dropped out of the race for the GOP presidential nomination on Sunday, hours after finishing a disappointing third in the Iowa straw poll."  - The Blaze

Tim Who?  I actually know who he is but I can't blame him for dropping out because Snuggie™ actually has more Facebook fans than Tim Pawlenty does.

Today's Top Quote

"If you look at a dog and not feel vicarious excitement and affection, you must be a cat!" ~ Anonymous :)

Today's Top Video

I'm not usually big on the videos but I had to share this one.

What did you learn on Facebook today?



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