Tuesday, May 17, 2011

The Marriage Terminator!

Today's Top News

Oh Arnold!

Today I learned how Arnold Schwarzenegger terminated his marriage with Maria Shriver.  It seems that The Gov had some love with a household staff member and I'm assuming it was a woman because they had a child.  If you want to read more about the whole sorted affair, click here!


Today's Top Status

Turn off the drama and live the dream.  This seemed like some great advice but if people really took it I wouldn't have anything to blog about now would I. :)

Today's Top Joke

It got crowded in heaven so, for one day and one day only, it was decided to only accept people who had a really bad day on the day they died.

St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died." The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, of which I died from." St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in.

He then asked the next man in line about the day he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!" St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job.

"Tell me about the day you died?” he said to the third man in line. "OK, picture this; I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator...."

What did you learn on Facebook today?

3 comments:

  1. thanks for the follow on my blog! I am now following you back :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. What did I learn today?

    Well, thanks to YOU, I *think* I finally learned how to post raw html so the smart quotes are disabled and my "I Heart Blogging" button actually works.

    I think.

    I hope.

    Wanna let me know next Wednesday? ;)

    Thanks so much! I'm following back on GFC, FB and twitter.
    Mickey
    A Helicopter Mom

    ReplyDelete
  3. So sad... I feel awful for Maria Shriver!

    Thank you for following me at 7 on a Shoestring... following you back via GFC!

    ReplyDelete

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