Today's Top News
I found out today that some guy went to a place of business with all his business hanging out. Yup, he went to ask for a job in his birthday suit! The article said he was high on meth, so no need to send him for a drug test before seeing if you want to offer him a job; no matter how long his resume might have been. ;)
Today's Top Status
"WOW!!!!42% and growing!!" If I didn't know this person was talking about political poll numbers, I would have been worried she had ordered her hubby some of those blue bills offered up daily in one's spam folder.
Today's Top Picture
The only thing the cover is missing is catchy stuff like "how to decorate your new cardboard box" or "fine dumpster dining"
An assortment of news, jokes, and even some strange stuff I've learned from my friends' Facebook postings.
Showing posts with label economy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label economy. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Special Edition: State of The U.S. Economy
Found this one, this morning on Facebook and had to share!
The recession has hit everybody really hard...
My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.
I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally....
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, all the wars, no jobs for 1/10th of the nation, my savings, Social Security, my 401K AND retirement funds, etc.;
I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
What did you learn on Facebook today?
The recession has hit everybody really hard...
My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.
I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally....
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, all the wars, no jobs for 1/10th of the nation, my savings, Social Security, my 401K AND retirement funds, etc.;
I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
What did you learn on Facebook today?
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